2019-06-06

Hello Key Biscayne!

We’re here, the time of year when your sweat and the humidity in the air bind into one. There’s a bit in here about the beach, a bit more on our taxes, some seaweed talk, and a bit off the small town grapevine. Enjoy the Rag.

I received an anonymous tip last week about something brewing over at the Community Center. Do you like tai chi?

There’s this tai chi class. It’s a very compelling tai chi class. See, the regular instructor, Marius, he’s been teaching for 20 years. He took a break recently to recover from illness (measles?), and in his place appeared Ian, a strapping 20 year old from Cape Town who recently returned from studying martial arts with monks in China.

The tipster informs me that the “bridge club is abuzz about the class — and instructor,” and that word is getting around about his prowess.

A follow-up email to try and figure out just what I could expect from this ‘prowess’ didn’t yield a conclusive answer, but I’m told you can find out the secrets of yin and yang for yourself Fridays and Sundays at 8:30am. ☯

Can’t have your cake Have you ever seen tourists on the island driving around trying to find a way to get to the beach? We have two obscure public access points, and neither have parking. We have the Beach Park, but you need to be a resident. This is all by design; to keep the beach as private as possible.

This design has now come back to bite us in the ass. We need to restore the sand on the beach every few years, it costs millions, and we were hoping the federal government could pitch in. They’ve told us they only give money to publicly accessible beaches, and ours doesn’t make the cut. 🍰

(Key News)

Biggest losers I hope you’re not thinking of selling your place soon, because things aren’t looking so hot on the Key (unless it’s a really, really nice place).

The Miami-Dade property appraiser is projecting a 2.8% decrease in property values (and thus tax revenue) for Key Biscayne this year, the largest decrease for any city in the county. If that number is correct, it could mean the Village is down $700k when making the budget for next year, which means some tough decisions for the council. 📉

(Key News)

I can’t tell you how long it will last, but as of writing the way the wind is blowing (or not blowing) is making it so there’s not very much seaweed in the ocean. I suggest you take advantage before it comes back.

If you’re looking for a good explanation for why the seaweed has been so bad lately, and the last few years, a reader points us to a great video which explains it, and gives some possible solutions.

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Questions, comments, tips, or to get dinner at Vito’s 🍝, write to hi@tropicalrag.com.

Remember that Key Rat Bahamas wedding I told you about two weeks ago? There’s photos in the Islander today. See you next week!

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