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Your weekly slice of island life.


Hello Key Biscayne!

As of publishing time, the front page of one of our local periodicals is a picture of a turd. I guess that’s the kind of week we’re having on the island.

In more promising news, the council seems to all like each other again. They say time is a healer, or maybe it was Wellness William’s (neé Bicycle Bill) laughing exercises at the start of the session that did the trick. With that attitude, they managed to pass a budget on Tuesday.

Spooky time

The Haunted Hike is Key Biscayne's spookiest Halloween experience. It's taking place Oct. 18-19 at Bill Baggs State Park. Fun and scary for the whole family. Are you interested in scaring little kids and their parents? Participating in the Hike is a blast and there's big cash prizes this year.

(More info)

Promote your own thing.


Renter beware You go to rent a place and the landlord wants you to pay first and last month’s rent, and then a security deposit (which they’ll later fight you to keep). You pay it; your ass is a little sore but you can manage. Then you find out the condo association wants $100 for processing your application, plus another $150 for some random administration fee.

Not so fast. It turns out that a condo association, by law, can’t charge you more than $100 to move in to your place. A group of renters in Miami noticed their condo was charging $250 in various administration fees to move into the building. Citing the law, they sued, settled, and the fees were brought back down. 💸

(Miami Herald)

Yea yea Some lady saw some poops on the beach in front of Key Colony, took pictures, posted them to a chat, and a news article was written about it. Whose poop is it? Who knows. Armchair poo experts are saying it’s manatee poop. 💩

(Key News)

From the peanut gallery

Last week we asked what you thought a suspicious package on the beach could be.

Multiple plastic bags, and a red scarf.


A mannequin? Looks like a dead body to me…


The picture is a headless papier mâché doll wearing addled Sinbad the Sailor pants.



Around Town

  • Friday 9/27
  • 🍻 Real Germans, real lederhosen at the longest running Oktoberfest (Beach Club)
  • Saturday 9/28
  • 🃏 Liquor up front, poker in the rear (KBYC)
  • 🥳 Don't know Chip? Come meet him at his birthday (Lincoln's Beard)

Last Week's Sales

Location SQFT Rooms Prev Price
201 Galen 109W 946 1/2.5 '77 $33.7k $308k

An abrupt ending

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Get out to the skihole on Saturday. 🕳

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