2019-10-24
Hello Key Biscayne!
Another week, another Rag.
Someone suggested the newsletter should always open with a photo near the top. They say it’s good for engagement, even if it has nothing to do with anything.
Doesn't this house look like Key Colony?
On we go.
Articles of text
Oh, the water, ohhh, the water As mentioned last week, the Village Council is finally getting the ball rolling to try and find a solution to our constant poop-smoothie beaches. They’re gonna check if the poop is human or not, they’re gonna check if there’s poop in the flood water, they’re gonna check septic tanks, they’re gonna check fertilizer, they’re gonna check seaweed, and they’re gonna check if you’ve got a skidmark in your bathing suit. ♒︎
(Key News)
Parklife The council approved buying two properties, 571 and 599 Harbor Drive, for $4.03m. If the deals go through, they’ll be converted into a new park. If the deals don’t go through, they’ll be converted into one of those contemporary box-shaped houses with a little stone accent on the front. ◻️
(Key News)
From the peanut gallery
Speaking to last week’s KB flag:
The orange in the flag is the sunset glow. This flag would be perfect for KB…says it all.
-AA
Calendar
Around Town
- Today 10/24
- 📖 Complain about the new library (Village Hall)
- Friday 10/25
- 🍻 $30 beer/wine open bar (Milanezza)
- 🇧🇸 They still need help (Crossbridge Church)
- Sunday 10/27
- 🍁 Celebrate a season we don't even have (Civic Park)
- 🎻 4 Strings are better than 1 (Community Center)
- Tuesday 10/29
- 🎣 Final vote on whether to ban fishing on Mashta (Village Hall)
- 🍖 Ever wonder what human flesh tastes like? (St. Agnes)
- 🖼 Don't sound like an idiot when discussing Art Basel (Community Center)
Last Week's Sales
| Location | SQFT | Rooms | Prev | Price |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Oceana 404S | 1837 | 2.5/3.5 | '18 $2.5m | $2.875m |
| 445 Allendale | 1312 | 3/1 | '10 $885k | $1.15m |
| Towers C302 | 1782 | 2/2 | '89 $280k | $630k |
Tail wags the dog
Back in July the Rag ran a brief filler original piece about the history of the Calusa Playhouse. It even had some original photos. It was titled, “This old shack.”
The original caption was more witty.
Coincidentally, today, the Islander News also has a piece about the history of the Calusa Playhouse, with “shack” in the title, and it even has the exact photo you see above.
The Rag would like to thank you, the readers. We did it; we made it to the big leagues. 😏
Toodles
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